My neck feels hot and some healing technique for pain

Thankful for cure, love, sanity, bliss, remembrance of Allah, may he be glorified and exalted. Alhamdulillah. I am pleased with Allah. I love my God. I love blogging here. I have 15 minutes as a schedule for writing here. Let us have sabr or patience. A beautiful patience. I hope I am helping you with the contents of this site. Allahuakbar or God is the greatest. I remember I was kind of insane yesterday. I hope not today. It is 1:27 on the clock on the computer now. I still have azr, maghrib, and isha to pray later on. I place my trust in Allah. I realize that if you put your trust in him, he wills good for you. I just slept after I cannot take it anymore yesterday. I was using the computer. My neck feels hot right now. I already used the cover of my bed and two blankets to cover me so I can sweat. It's what healed me before, when I had this. it's just for about 5 minutes. The other sleep a while ago was for about 30 minutes and I only, I remember, had the 2 blankets. Is this fever? Why am I hot in the neck? It should be cold, right? Right now, I have a blanket over me. There's this electric fan here, on a ceiling, that's on and I already asked if mom knows where the switch is for that and I remember she said no. The other one that she think knows where the switch is is asleep, she said. The other one, we are not sure if she knows. I think if she knows, she would have already helped. Just a little more and I'm done here. I read something, and I remember it as this, that if you have pain on yourself, you say, 'In the name of Allah', 3 times. After that place your hand on the part where there is pain and say, 'I seek refuge with Allah and his power from the evil that I find and that I fear', 7 times.

Panicked again yesterday

I'm thankful for hope, Allah's mercy, writing, blog, grace of the Lord. There are paranormal beings telling what's inside my mind. I hope you pray for me. Thank you. May the Lord have mercy on me and the believers and may he guide the unbelievers. Allah is good. I have that affirmation on my wall and I used masking tape. Of course, he is also severe in punishment, but his mercy prevailed over his wrath. Allah is with the patient, he says. Alhamdulillah or praise be to God. I have given out a card, I remember, of this site, to a shop at the ground floor of our condo. We're in the 3rd Floor. Me, dad, mom, and I don't want to share the names of my siblings.

I felt cold or hot a while ago and I have a simple solution

Thankful for rest, recovery, blankets, ease, mercy. Alhamdulillah or praise be to God. I felt maybe cold or hot a while ago. What I did before about this which is effective to eliminate the illness is I sweated myself by lying down in bed covered in a blanket, and I just remember it was a thick one. A thick one will make you sweat because it will be hot inside. Thin ones can have little holes where air can get in. After sweating for a time inside the blanket, I felt I was back to normal. The feeling was not there anymore, as I can remember, after sweating for a time inside the blanket. This is what I did today too, just a while ago. I had a thin blanket, but I had another one the same. I used them both to cover me, and after a while, the cold feeling or hot one on my neck disappeared. There is sweat on it now. I still have the blankets on me while I type this. Alhamdulillah. May Allah be glorified and exalted. I am lucky to be born a Muslim. Yes, there are lots of trials along the way, and other people view you as someone dangerous to them, but your actions toward the people will come into effect. But the fact that if I'm born Muslim, I can pray anytime in the house and not be rejected by the people living there. Other converts get stopped by their family. There is a reason for everything, as they say. Allah is all-knower. Most kind. Have trust in him. Let us not kill ourselves, for if we do that, we will do that in hell forever, as long as Allah wills. It is also said something like, 'Do they think they will be in hell just for a number of days?' May Allah guide the unbelievers and have mercy on the believers. I love Allah. He is the best. Sleep is minor death. When you feel depressed, sleep. Sleep when you need it. Most of the time, you'll feel energized and fresh when you wake up and you sort of forget the bad thing that happened. We are all going to die our last death in this existence. Have Sabr: Patience or endurance. I read somewhere in a comment, and maybe this was said by a companion of the prophet, that we should get used to a tough life, for luxury doesn't last in this world.

I feel blessed

Thankful for blessings, cooperation, Islam, God, freedom. May Allah be glorified and exalted. Alhamdulillah or praise be to God. I love Islam. Islam has changed my life so good. I love following it's laws. I know it's for my good. We should conceal the faults of Muslims if you're a Muslim as I read. I want to create videos. Sometimes, people here in the house are asleep. I already created some videos before. I want to record some songs. I am being careful of what I send out externally from myself to the world as doing bad to others will hurt me as well. It is taught in Islam that if you save a human life, it is as if you have saved mankind. Hasten in good deeds, as commanded in the Quran.

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Hasten to do good deeds before there come tribulations like pieces of a dark night, when a man will be a believer in the morning and a kaafir by evening, or he will be a believer in the evening and a kaafir by morning, selling his religious commitment for worldly gain.”

It is as if I am in a prison. It is said in Islam that the world is the prison of the Muslim, while for the kafir or unbeliever, it is paradise. I am really detained. I can only go out in the morning for about an hour and I must be near to the unit. We live in a condo. I must have sabr or patience. Sabr also means persistence, perseverance, and endurance. Let's have a beautiful patience, as they like to say. Allah is with the patient. If you remember Allah, he will remember you as well. We should be careful in this life. It's not too late while you're still here to repent. If I were you, I would take the initiative to know the truth, and that for me, is Allah is the only God. Islam is the only religion that God will accept. What else of a religion does a person bow down to God? Based on observation, Christians sit on a church while Muslims bow down and they are religious and are strict in following the orders of Allah. Some Christians may kneel, and bow down, but sometimes, they just do that when they want to or feel like it. I am more scared than Allah than these paranormal beings that tell what's inside my mind. I wonder if one day people will know my story. And they will be mesmerized, if Allah wills, by this strange phenomena and may believe in Allah. Look around you. I think it's enough proof that there is a God. And what about this paranormal beings telling what's inside my mind? Do you not ponder that God created this? Who else can?

I feel great

Thankful for Allah's mercy, kindness, ink, pens, Allah's grace, good. May Allah be glorified and exalted. Alhamdulillah or praise be to Allah. I was kind of crazy maybe two days ago concerning the paranormal I have here which tells what's inside my mind. Now, I am alright. I am learning more to be patient. I don't want to kill myself by hurting myself. I die anyways when I go to sleep. Sleep is minor death and I must tell, when I just slept yesterday, as far as I remember, it was the day I became crazy and the day after that, I felt fresh and good when I woke up. I remember a dream. I don't want to share it. Allahuakbar or Allah is the greatest. I am excited to go to Jannah. Do you know that reciting the Ayat-Al-Kursi after every prayer will make you go to Jannah when you die. The only thing that is a barrier between you and Jannah is death, as far as I remember, if you recite it after every obligatory prayer.

Here is the Ayat Al-Kursi:

Allahu laaa ilaaha illaa huwal haiyul qai-yoom; laa taakhuzuhoo sinatunw wa laa nawm; lahoo maa fissamaawaati wa maa fil ard; man zallazee yashfa'u indahooo illaa be iznih; ya'lamu maa baina aideehim wa maa khalfahum; wa laa yuheetoona beshai 'immin 'ilmihee illa be maa shaaaa; wasi'a kursiyyuhus samaa waati wal arda wa la ya'ooduho hifzuhumaa; wa huwal aliyyul 'azeem

اللَّهُ لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ هُوَ الْحَيُّ الْقَيُّومُ لاَ تَأْخُذُهُ سِنَةٌ وَلاَ نَوْمٌ لَهُ مَا فِي السَّمَاوَاتِ وَمَا فِي الأَرْضِ مَنْ ذَا الَّذِي يَشْفَعُ عِنْدَهُ إِلاَّ بِإِذْنِهِ يَعْلَمُ مَا بَيْنَ أَيْدِيهِمْ وَمَا خَلْفَهُمْ وَلاَ يُحِيطُونَ بِشَيْءٍ مِنْ عِلْمِهِ إِلاَّ بِمَا شَاءَ وَسِعَ كُرْسِيُّهُ السَّمَاواتِ وَالأَرْضَ وَلاَ يَئُودُهُ حِفْظُهُمَا وَهُوَ الْعَلِيُّ الْعَظِيمُ

"Allah! There is no god but He - the Living, The Self-subsisting, Eternal. No slumber can seize Him Nor Sleep. His are all things In the heavens and on earth. Who is there can intercede In His presence except As he permitteth? He knoweth What (appeareth to His creatures As) Before or After or Behind them. Nor shall they compass Aught of his knowledge Except as He willeth. His throne doth extend Over the heavens And on earth, and He feeleth No fatigue in guarding And preserving them, For He is the Most High. The Supreme (in glory)."

It's a new day

Thankful for life, good, paradise, Allah(may he be glorified and exalted), fairness. Alhamdulillah or praise be to God. Yeah. It's a new day. I love praying to Allah. He is the best. We must take care of ourselves. Allah has given us life. He can take it away any time. Allah has made my life easier with the paranormal I have that says what's inside my mind. Alhamdulillah. God is most merciful. I hope no one else experiences what I'm experiencing like that with the paranormal I have. I am thankful for sleep. It is minor death, based on Islam, as far as I know. So whenever you want to kill yourself because of a problem, take your time to think well and just sleep. You can perform ablution any time and pray to Allah. I remember reading something that said that the prophet Muhammad prays when he is happy of something. Maybe you can do that as well when you are sad.

There are alcohol ingredients on cigarettes based on a website I found

Bismillah or in the name of Allah, may he be glorified and exalted. I am thankful for good, abstaining from evil, my breathe, calm, mercy. Allah increases what you are thankful for. Go here to see what I saw about alcohol in cigarettes. Alcohol is forbidden or haram in Islam. One of these ahaadeeth was narrated by Ibn Maajah (3377) from ‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Amr who said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Whoever drinks alcohol and gets drunk, his prayer will not be accepted for forty days and if he dies he will go to Hell. But if he repents, Allaah will accept his repentance. If he again drinks alcohol and gets drunk, his prayer will not be accepted for forty days and if he dies he will go to Hell. But if he repents, Allaah will accept his repentance. If he again drinks alcohol and gets drunk, his prayer will not be accepted for forty days and if he dies he will go to Hell. But if he repents, Allaah will accept his repentance. If he commits (this sin) again, then Allaah pledges to make him drink the mud of khabaal on the Day of Resurrection.” They asked, “O Messenger of Allaah, what is the mud of khabaal?” He said, “The juices of the people of Hell.”

I feel smooth and easy

Thankful for smooth, ease, Mufti Menk, paradise, love. I try to be careful as I can with things. I love my things. I love them dearly. I take care of them. Sometimes, like I said, I may hit them hard unintentionally. Allah, may you be glorified and exalted, is the greatest. He is the best. Allahuakbar, or as I said, Allah is the greatest. I want to create an English Translation of prayer so English people who converted to Islam can know what they are uttering or for mute people, thinking about it. Maybe uttering it without sound as well. I have secrets. God is good. I am excited to go to jannah or paradise. I love blogger. It has helped me a great deal. I feel good. I love Allah. I want to help. I wonder what people are thinking when they go to this blog. I love the truth. I am being careful in talking. The paranormal who speak what's inside my mind made me realize the importance of words. They speak constantly what is in my mind.

I am truly becoming good in making friends

Thankful for being alive, good health, car, fairness, simplicity. Other people consider a real friend someone who bullies. I don't believe you have to intentionally hurt your friend to be called a real friend. Maybe what they are telling is that that is being real. Being honest with your feelings. Some of these people don't practice restraint and they have no guidance from Allah, may he be glorified and exalted. They have their own rules but their friends have their own too. In Islam, we all follow one God and follow the laws he has made for us to live peacefully. Allahuakbar or God is the greatest. I find peace and rest in mentioning God's name. It is said that that really is true that we find rest and peace in his name. I want to go outside while mom is still here. I am so thankful to Allah for guiding me. Allah is with the patient. Let us stay patient so Allah will be with us. “None of you believes until he wishes for his brother what he wishes for himself.” (An-Nawawi’s Forty Hadith 13)

Panicked yesterday but I'm back

Thankful for recovery, lessons, books, simplicity, good. I learned a lesson. You can sleep a problem. Sleep is minor death. I felt fresh when I woke up. I little groggy from the memories of yesterday. But I feel alive and anew. I can't share all that happened. Anyway, I am grateful to the Lord for keeping me alive until now. Especially on all those times I panicked and had tragedies. I don't pray Ishraq prayer anymore. The voluntary prayer sometimes some Muslims pray after Fajr, where they wait up until sunrise, and some say 20 minutes after that, Ishraq is prayed. May Allah, may he be glorified and exalted, forgive my errors, mistakes, and sins in life and grant me Jannah with my family. I consider humanity as my family. Including animals. Just a little more and I'm done here. As I already said, I have a 15 minute schedule for this. These paranormal beings that tell what's inside my mind, I now consider a blessing. I have an affirmation saying that, and thanking Allah. I have a goal of 100,000,000 Philippine Pesos on Nov. 5, 2028, while having a goal of P1,000,000 on Nov. 5, 2020. But I'm thinking of making my Inside Pen biz(site on Links at the right side panel) have a sign saying, "Pay whatever you can". I'm still to know if this is right in Islam. I just feel sympathy with others, and if I will be rich or poor, I just let it go with Allah's will. Poor believers will enter Jannah first than the rich.

Praise be to God

Thankful for life, fairness, good, Allah's mercy, happiness. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). I sometimes think of a good idea on what to write here, but maybe I am sleeping that time and the light I have here is broken that I don't jot it down to remember. I have a 'Do' list. I'm still to fix it, inshAllah(if Allah wills it). Do you know Mufti Menk? After a while watching his videos, I wanted to become a Mufti because I was thinking of a way to become more Muslim. Now, I will try to be an imam first. As far as I remember, my dad and maybe mom too suggested that I be an imam when I was in a hospital called the East Avenue Medical Center(EAMC). I really want to go to heaven with my family. I completed my song, 'Bliss'. I'm thinking right now if I would share it like before, when it wasn't still finished. Hm... Maybe some other time. Just a little more, and I'm done here, inshAllah. I love my family. We all came from the same father, Adam. I remember writing back then on Environmental Science, on a test of it that I consider all of humanity as family.

Grateful again

Thankful for life, good, pleasure of Allah, charity, cats. Alhamdulillah or praise be to God. May the Lord be glorified and exalted. I feel wonderful. There is hardship, but as far as I know, Allah expiates our sins using those. May Allah forgive me for my errors. God is the wisest of all. Allahuakbar or God is the greatest. I try to always capitalize the G in God. It looks better and looks appropriate for a name that is most honorable. The paranormal is still here. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdilillah. I am so thankful to Allah because he has given me bliss despite the paranormal. Mom is here. She seems happy. I love her. It is said that Paradise is at the feet of the mother. Alhamdulillah. Thanks to the Lord. I feel good. I'm writing a book called 1000 Ways to Survive, and I'm thinking of continuing what I'm hesitating to write which is called 1000 Islamic Jokes. Ha ha. Only laugh low. Laughing excessively is bad.

I wonder when is my final death

Thankful for sleep, calm, relaxation, peace, happiness. Yeah. Sleep is minor death. I wonder when is my final death here in this world. Who knows? I may go outer space before I die. If that doesn't happen in this life, then on the next life. I can be on other planets. Alhamdulillah. Maybe there are specific galaxies as well in Paradise. I have a new way in taking care of the paranormal problem I have. There are paranormal beings saying what's inside my mind. It's a struggle. I'm learning to stay calm and relax while it's here. If you conceal the faults of a Muslim, Allah will conceal yours in this life and in the hereafter. I was thinking if I want to share about the paranormal speaking my mind. When I think of prayers, sometimes they recite it and it sounds like they are Muslims too. I am sad because I learned somewhere in the Chinese lands that Muslims are tortured and killed. May we help them in any way we can. It's like the time of the Nazis where they kill Jews. The light I have in my bunk in bed where I mostly stay the whole day nowadays got it's wires pulled out by me accidentally. The plug is now separate from the wire, if I'm correct. Maybe there are still wires inside the plug. I'm still to see. I'm limp as of the moment. I love my family. When I think of them sometimes, I don't want to kill myself. Killing yourself has punishment. You'll do it in hell over and over again. I read somewhere, but I'm not sure, that you can kill yourself if you are in a state of injustice. It's hard to find the site where I saw that. But to make sure, do good research on don't believe me fully. I may be wrong. I'm not sure, as I said. Maybe I just forgot and that entails killing the enemy. I'm not sure of that as well. I miss my parents. I miss my mother's voice. My father's too. I miss their love. I'm staying natural with the paranormal as much as I can. There are properties I am helping a person sell on my 2 previous posts. You can check them if you want. I think it the prices are negotiable. I'm sure of the other one as negotaible; the Moldex property. The vacant lot, not sure if it is. But I think that you can ask that to the person. Just tell me on Facebook. I have a link on the right-side panel of my FB on the 'Links'.

Vacant Lot for sale

Filinvest Calamba Laguna, 102-105 square meters mag katabing lote(two lots side by side) for 2.5 Million pesos.

Moldex Residence property for sale

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09164376876

Grateful

I am grateful for life, Allah(may he be glorified and exalted)'s mercy, thanks, love, care. Let us persevere. Life can be good if we are good. You can surrender to Allah from time to time. I surrender myself to him each time I pray to him. I say, "Allahuakbar" before praying and give up my hands to him. Myself. Let us abstain from sin. Allah is kind. Allah is merciful. The best of sinners are those who repent, and we are all sinners. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). I hope I am helping you. I hope we meet each other in Jannah(Paradise). Allah is the greatest or Allahuakbar. Some people say quitting can be healthy. That's why I shared to you that you can surrender to Allah. Being angry is evil. We must abstain from it. We must have good faith in Allah so he will guide us in this world which can deceive you by it's glitter. I got many visitors to my site. Alhamudlillah. That is good. What is even better is I help each one that passes by here. May Allah guide the ummah(the whole community of Muslims bound together by ties of religion). Allahuakbar. I love Allah. I love Muhammad and all the prophets and all the Muslims. I can love non-Muslims. Do you know that we should treat them always as potential Muslims? We shouldn't hurt them. We should only fight the lesser Jihad or battling them with the sword or gun if they attack us with those first. If it is only necessary. We should not be the first to initiate battle or else we will deviate from the straight path. Only when they are in war with us. Still, we can forgive when evil befalls us from others, and Allah will save your soul and be happy with you. If there is no other choice but to battle, be brave and seek the help of Allah to give you strength and never surrender battling the enemy. Allah commands us to spread peace. I love Islam. I love what I learn from poverty, and may Allah help us with that and make us believers still despite the fact that we are in that state because it is said that poverty brings unbelief. It feels good to do good. I love reciting Al-Khaf during Fridays. We are recommended to recite it. I learn each time I read it. I love my website. It has become more good since I embraced Islam and worshiped Allah. I am becoming more successful. I love Allah the best. Allah is the wisest of All. It's good to worship a God that is true. Look around you, isn't it enough that these faces everywhere make you think well that there is a God? And if there is a God, we should do what we can to make him love us.

Thankful for all the blessings

I'm thankful for blessings, sharing, simplicity, comprehension, family. Yeah. Praise be to God. I am progressing each day. I am succeeding. I am practicing not to be angry anymore. I want to be calm. I don't want to lash out in anger. The prophet Muhammad advised someone not to be angry when that person asked him again and again of an advice or something. The prophet Muhammad just replied the same thing, "Do not be angry". If you control your anger Allah will save you. Allah is so powerful. His mercy is much better than his anger. I want to help more in the family even if I'm limp. I want to help with what I can. I love God. I love Islam. I am writing a book called Islam within Reason and 1000 Ways to Survive. I have an idea on how it can be faster to create copies of it with the help of other people. I am being good with other people. I do good to them. I say I love you to them. I respect my self. My thoughts and emotions. I am abstaining from sin. Jannah(Paradise) is near. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). May I reach it with family, you, and everybody else. I wrote on a paper, "Rest in peace" with my name on it.

It is said that sleep is minor death in Islam. I've heard before knowing that, a long time ago, that when we are awake, we are alive, and when we are asleep, we are dead. Before sleeping, a Muslim can say for calm, "With your name o Allah, I die and I live", and when he wakes up, "All praises are for Allah, who has made us alive, after he made us die, and unto him, is the resurrection." This habit will make us aware of Allah, may he be glorified and exalted, and it is said that only in his name do hearts find peace. Some Muslims have already dug their graves and they stay there reading the Quran and maybe think of the life in the next world. I also learned that it is good to be at times near to death. I also read that we should think of death 20 times each day. That way we could prepare for the next life and be careful with our actions here. Knowing that our deeds are recorded makes things worthwhile. Take care of yourself. Don't destroy yourself. Don't kill yourself for the punishment is you will do that in hell over and over again. Breathe. Stay calm.

To Do List to Action List

In the name of God, I am thankful for halal(permissible) food, clothing, good health, sound mind, fruitful life, dates(the ones Muslims eat).

I found this Action List that I thought of pretty effective in eliminating stress. Instead of pressuring myself on a day to day basis on checking all on my list, I instead have a list of things I can choose to take action on, and so I don't get discouraged when I don't check the box. Before I check boxes, but now, I don't. I don't use boxes to save ink and space on the computer. I both have a list on my notebook for when I shut down the computer, and when I got an idea of what I can do next in the morning. On the computer, while I'm doing something there, I can use the list I have in that PC to write on it. I simply put a check or / to save ink or space on the notepad. Maybe that can save memory and energy for the computer. I know you may feel that your new "Action List" may feel like you need to do it, but what I am pointing out on this new way is to remove the stress from us wanting us to check the list as done on the day. I have come across something that said that you should turn your "To Do list" into a "Not to Do list" because you come to not check all the boxes. For me, my health is important and I don't want to pressure myself in checking all the boxes and it's alright for me not to even check all on the list for I am only human and I can change my mind any time of the day and also because of external reasons. Maybe one day, when it gets useful, I can check on the list again when I just want something to do.

A good message

I am thankful for earphones, things without a price tag, free, good well-being, Allah's help on the test, Allah's justice.

This message isn't only for my Muslim friends, but let me start with the name of God.

Us, my Muslim friends, should be thankful to our Lord for it was easier for us to submit to him and pray to him than non-Muslims. Some non-Muslims want to become Muslim, but of course, as humans, they are synthesizing or combining (a number of things) into a coherent whole in themselves about the truth, and we should be open to them, and embrace them as potential Muslims. I know there might be Surahs like the Surah of Al-Kafirun, but it's your choice if you want to include that in your prayer. Maybe sometimes, it is useful when you are in a state where you want to express it and expecting that your feelings will be alright. Words have power my friends. A single word can alter everything. That is why sometimes it is best to just keep quiet instead of saying anything, because in our imperfect ways, and weakness, we can say something bad or evil, and make our other actions the same. This message isn't only for my Muslim friends. We Muslims are also synthesizing the truth. But isn't it true that if you are born in a Muslim family, and you do not pray, you can pray anytime with the prostration, and no one will stop you? I have read that converts to Islam in a non-Muslim family, when they see the convert praying, they would worry and stop them. Of course, we have been given reason, and these parents, for example, who stop these children on praying as a Muslim, have their own knowledge of things and that is why we must be careful in making a good reputation of Islam. You can start in your neighborhood. You can start online. A simple post can save lives.

Life's fun

I am thankful for the fun life, the challenge of the paranormal and the ease Allah, may he be glorified and exalted, gives to me, calm, taking it easy, sabr(patience, perseverance, persistence, endurance). I got depressed again a few days ago. It's the paranormal saying what's inside my mind. It's alright. I'm back with a new zest. I am thankful as well that family is still here. My older sister passed away and I read somewhere, as far as I can remember, that if 100 people pray for her, she can be sent to heaven. Can you do that for her? May Allah have mercy on her soul and to my other relatives. I thought I couldn't stay put and be calm inside this dorm with the paranormal. I am allowed to go out now in the morning, when my mother is still here, preparing to work outside. For me, everything that we do to exert effort, even an immobile thing or person, is denoting 'work'. You are working. Everything is working. It is said by others that everything is in motion. Imagine atoms moving on an object. It is part of that object. And that object means it is working. It's potential can still exert effort to other things. I remember coming home from school, and suddenly, a thought came to my mind, "Everything you do is work". Maybe it was said cause I'm tired from going to school back to back. But what I really got from that message is what I said. Going to school is work for a child. Don't ever say that they are not working, and that what they are doing is easier. Are you sure? They do not know what you know that may help you in your current situation to make things easier for yourself. Teach your kids good, and be a good role model. Don't just say things to them. Show them by practicing what you are telling them to do, doing them. It will be easier that way.

It's alright

I am thankful for this life, sabr, good, Allah's mercy, paradise. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). It's just like before somehow, like when I was crazy. I got scared of moving. Paralyzed. Only in bed. There are these paranormal beings telling what's inside my mind. I feel good somehow though. Alhamdulillah. I handed out some cards I made with my site name on it. I just written it there. I got the card paper from some scraps of paper. I am thankful. Alhamdulillah. I got a good nap on Qailulah(the siesta of Muslims). I got only to sleep a few moments. The paranormal's here. May Allah guide me and help me. He is doing that.

I feel good

I am thankful for feeling good, abstaining from sin, Allah(may he be glorified and exalted)'s help, forgiveness, self-control. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). I feel good. As I've told, I am now allowed to go outside the unit, but not far away, only where they can see me. I cannot go down or up other floors. It's alright. I'm being disciplined. They don't want problems. It's great to be alive and worshiping the only true God which is Allah. Alhamdulillah. I'm thinking, maybe I'll be famous one day and people will be searching my name on Google and come to this site. For anybody who wants to help and can afford it, you can donate to my Paypal. There's a link to that on the right side panel. I'm going to fast again on Thursday. Alhamdulillah. Allah is the greatest or Allahuakbar. I am oh so thankful to the Lord Allah for all the blessings he has bestowed upon me. I am nothing without Allah. I belong to him, and to him I shall return. You say you belong to him and will return to him when you face calamity knowing that whatever is happening to you, it is sure you will come back to your Lord. I am interested in applying lessons from poverty. There are precious lessons there. I dream of a home where there are recycled things, practical arts, and whatever I learned that are good. I studied practical arts, maybe back at grade school, where we created what my teacher calls, as far as I remember, a 'Slam book'. I consider a notebook also a book. That's alright 'cause it's a book with notes. I have these notebooks where I've jotted notes and I envision it on a library of mine. Even if that library just starts here, even on a shelf. It's not on a shelf now, but it's right here on a desk where the computer is.

Suddenly felt panicky on Sunday

I am thankful for life, hope, movement, lucky than others, Allah(may he be glorified and exalted). Gave out two already, as far as I remember, my sites on cards I just cut off using scissors and written my site on them. On the topic. After, I guess, a whole week of being alright, I then felt panicky on Sunday. Last Sunday, not Sunday yesterday, I think. Or maybe it was yesterday. Still. I persevered. There are these ghosts telling what's inside my mind. We all have problems. I'm lucky because I have a home, my family(parents are still alive), Allah, a laptop, not someone who is in the hospital. Well, I've been there. But now I'm home. I miss my parents. I wonder how they're doing. I have one life to live. I'm 26 years old. I just downloaded music on sound cloud. I am downloading music legally. I want to learn Arabic. How to read it and write it. I should just let the paranormal say what they want to say whatever it is. I just need to pretend everything's alright like before. I mean. Just let it flow. Whatever happens. Do I need to pretend? Hm... Whatever. Just like everything's normal. And if it's not. Persevere. Have Sabr.

What success means to me.

Success for me simply is defined as it is. I don't want to add another meaning to it. I mean... Success is success. A succession. That's all. The true success is reaching Jannah, as told by the Quran. I've been pondering about life. I must remain humble. How can I say this... What? What is it? This thing. They are my friends. I've created a song about them. Here it goes:

Bliss

Here I am again
lost in despair of hope
yet I remembered Allah
may he be glorified and exalted
so the story goes like this
i don't want enemies
just friends
but Iblis, maybe him
cursed me with this
paranormal beings
are they jinns?
ghosts or saitans
what is this?
do you hear it?
sometimes i miss
the days when it was quiet
with the mercy of Allah
even with this,
i am full of bliss

Chorus:

Hello there
My name is Emem
Can you hear me?
Salam walaikum
Allah cares
Who's with me?
It is Allah
Where am I?
I am home
Nearing the final abode
Paradise
I can't believe my eyes
I am home

Sometimes I don't know anymore
but I will strive
I will survive
I will, insha'Allah, create memories
to rest in peace
Oh, my God, what is this?

It's not finished yet. But I just want to share what I've done so far. I'm relaxing as I work. Work for me, is any action. Even if you're dead, you are still working. Why? You're spirit is alive. And even if it wasn't, your momentum or potential as a bone, defined as still you, is still working. You have, at your physical self, atoms, maybe moving. You are still working even if all that you are is immobile completely. Your work can still be great. I am working when I am breathing. I am working when I am thinking. I am working.

So what if you're To-Do list doesn't have all the boxes checked?

I changed my "To-Do" list to "Things I can do" to remove the stress and just to make it personal for me and different. If you have a To-Do list, then you may be wondering sometimes why you don't check all the boxes after the day has ended. Maybe sometimes you would leave a lot of boxes unchecked and maybe even sometimes you leave all unchecked. Me? I don't try to use boxes anymore. To save ink, I just put a check. I don't even try to put a dot or period. I noticed some pens would go out of ink fast. Mostly, those pens are borrowed from family. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). Some even changed the "To-Do" list to a "Not to do list". That could be effective. I think I've never tried it. Maybe I did. I don't remember. Maybe I can put a thing of that or two or more in my "Things I can do list" as well. When I open up the computer, after checking images of beautiful things, which is part of my routine, I go to it. Now, so what if you're list has unchecked boxes? That doesn't mean you're a bad person. You're just a human. Maybe that's why I changed my list to "Things I can do list" because if I name it a "To-do" list, I am pressuring myself to do it. With this, I can save it for days that I don't need to do anything and I don't follow a sched. If I can't think of anything to do and want to do something nice or productive, then I could get on the list. This is nice if you have some notebook, to write on the list and it's only for "Things you can do". Ideas for those.

I may have decided to be rich, but I like being poor, and I am thankful, and I adhere to it's lessons

I am thankful for poverty, contentment, being me, being okay, family. Yeah. I may decided to be rich and get money of P100,000,000(One hundred million Philippine pesos), but I still like the lifestyle of being poor. What I meant to say is that I will still recycle things. Reuse, reduce, recycle. I envision my home full of things recycled and so as the motto right there. I adhere to the lessons of being poor. Beside me here was fun to make. A simple tin can that I use to place my pen with a snippet inside it that I wrote saying, "I obey Allah". I took a pic on webcamtoy.com, but then I want to follow Islamic Law concerning pictures(you can read more here: https://islamqa.info/en/answers/365/ruling-on-photographs), even if it's pixelated, I'm still scared. Maybe those people are wrong. What if even pictures of people and animals(living) on computer isn't allowed either? I'm yet to go on this further. I may ask questions on a Masjid(mosque) or with Muslim friends or any knowledgeable Muslim. The journey continues. That is to make life easier. I saw a picture in an Islamic site where they didn't use a real life person(just shapes), to resemble a person doing salat(the obligatory prayers of a Muslim). Maybe they too think maybe that it also isn't allowed even on the computer but based on an article on Islam Q&A that I've read before(I'm not sure if the one above is it), told me that it's okay if it's on the computer, and some Facebook posts prohibit women from showing their faces(as far as I remember), and body without the hijab. As much as possible, even if it's hard sometimes, let us fear Allah(may he be glorified and exalted), and do not take sins lightly. Practice restraint and you will come soon to know how it's important in life despite what the western world is doing or saying or some other people, because we are tested in this dunya(world), and there are lots of dangerous things. Back on the topic. I don't care much if I acquire that money, as long as I do what's right. It's just one of my purpose, but worshiping Allah is my ultimate reason why I live. If I must do something unlawful for him or does not follow Islam, then I would not do it. Oh Allah, help me and the ummah(the whole community of Muslims bound together by ties of religion) struggling for your cause. I'm even thinking of not charging for anything when I'm selling my Inside Pen merchandise and just putting a sign saying, "You can pay any amount". I wanna be different. I want to remove the burden on people. I know what it feels like to be so poor. I still want to have transactions with Junk Shops. I want to buy or find an earphone that is big and better if it has a soft cushion on it's ear placement. I don't need the wire. I'll cut it, insha'Allah, if it has one. I just want to make an ear muff. I have these paranormal beings telling what's inside my mind. I didn't slept immediately at times before. Until later on. I hope you have learned something with me.

It's alright to be rich, and still adhering lessons from poverty

I am thankful for life, zest, ultimate glory of Allah(may he be glorified and exalted), simplicity, diskarte or strategy. I may not be still earning billions like Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, Trump and the others, but I am still alive and breathing and I can say there is a great chance and opportunity that I can still be rich. When I get rich, I am going to, insha'Allah, pay Zakat(our tax in Islam so we can give livelihood to the poor), offer Hajj, and build businesses that will help the world and the ummah. I am so dedicated to each enterprise I have in mind. I am building my life. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). He is my sustainer. He provides for me. I need to be obedient to him so he will help me with what I need in this life, and be what I want good things that will help me to worship Allah better each and every day. Allah is my only God. There is no other God for me but him. Isn't that a good thing to do? Look at these faces everywhere. Who else can do this except God? Then we must bow down to him as in now and do what's necessary to get close to him or we'll be losers and the worst thing is we could go to hell. "They realize not", said in the Quran, their actions, that they have been doing bad even if they think they have done good. Satan makes their deeds seem fair-seeming to them. I don't want that for me. Not for my family. It's good to have good relationships with family members. Even your relatives. That could help in your provision. Asking Allah's forgiveness by saying, "Astaghifrullah", can help you be provided by Allah. I like the humbleness and simplicity of being poor. I don't care what others say too much on how to be rich. I have natural instincts and I follow what I think is right or good. I accumulate good deeds, recorded, and they are my true richness, not really the physical money itself because you can have all the money in the world, but if you lack faith, and you lose God, then all of that would be in vain. I hope I can create another page when I use another computer. I've just made a reminder on my "Things I can do list". I'm removing the stress in my life that's why it's not a To-Do list. Maybe I'll change it back to the "To-Do" list if I find it ineffective. It's not only money that is saved. People get to be saved too. Ants store up bones of lizards in their hive or anything. It's amazing to be human and surrounded by other species. It's like a survival. But we came to a point where life has become much easier because of technology and advancements. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). A belief in God, doing good works, and the belief in the last day can make you be successful. Why belief in the last day is important? That makes us think we will not live forever, giving us hope that someday, all our grievances and hardships will come to pass, and the hope for Paradise, the ever-lasting success, shall come. Some people want to live so long. Sometimes, I get thoughts of that too. With paranormal beings telling what's inside my mind, I got so much into thinking into dying at the moment, but today is different. It's like, a miracle. I don't care so much anymore about it. It doesn't scare me like before. I am afraid of Allah. Not them. Or anything. I am just one of the ummah. I may be different, but I am one of them. Allahuakbar(Allah is the greatest). I am fasting today. I wonder who I can help with this blog. I hope everybody. I feel that I don't really care so much on being rich, as long as I do the right thing, I can let go of it. Think of Muhammad(peace and blessings be upon him), he lived an austere life away from riches yet he made it. Imagine a poor person praying sometimes 50 prayers a day, as I've read(may God forgive me for my errors), as that was the first order for us to pray by God, until changed, and still made it successfully to the real success, Paradise. He is full of faith and good, and good deeds are our true richness.

Panicked last last night, and slept the whole day yesterday, and back again

I am thankful to Allah(may he be glorified and exalted)'s mercy, I got back up again and moving, salat(prayer), blogging, hope. Yeah. It was devastating. There are these paranormal beings or super-natural beings, maybe ghosts or jinns telling what's inside my mind. I've learned a new technique to live with it. Anyway, I'm back pronouncing a definite purpose in life I've learned from a book called Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. I recite it in the morning and before sleeping. I feel the energy of it. I feel I am going to be rich. Now, I've talked about being rich or poor in Islam and what are the consequences on the previous post. If you haven't read it, I suggest you do. I've decided to be a rich Muslim. I am so excited. Contemplation of what you're life to become helps. I read about it on The Science of getting Rich. There's also a visualizing part in Think and Grow Rich. About 30 minutes. When I was outside our unit in the morning, I've drawn 1000 Philippine Peso bills on some pages, small ones, so when I read it again, I will be motivated and pumped up to my journey. This writing is good. I wonder if I would be on Forbes. I plan to achieve 100,000,000 Philippine Pesos by November 5, 2028, approximately 10 years and less, and it's on my birthday. I've just put in the affirmations I recite from time to time on the wall. I used masking tape on the other affirmations, and on this one, I've just written it on a note also taped by scotch tape because it still has space, and then recited it as well as the other affirmations. I don't recite it when the light's out to save electricity. If you can, you can copy me with this method of mine. It feels good when you remember the affirmations on your day or even night. I also have a digital visual board on this computer; pictures of things I want to achieve in life or remember, and I see it every morning. Before, I would see it 3 times a day. In the morning, afty, and evening. Now, I just want to save time. I do remember it.

Some pictures are:

I decided to become a rich Muslim

I am thankful for Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon hill, poverty, books, good knowledge, halal. I want to be a rich Muslim. This will help me a lot with my problem with the paranormal or super-natural beings telling what's inside my mind. There could come a time I need to use money to send them away. I don't want to hurt them. But if that's the case, if they are really evil, and it needs to be done, then whatever my Lord wills. Allahuakbar(Allah is the greatest). I will be rich, insha'Allah. The poor will enter Jannah ahead of the rich 40/500 years before the rich. But as I read and understand from this article here: https://questionsonislam.com/question/%E2%80%9C-poor-muslims-are-admitted-paradise-their-rich-half-day%E2%80%9D-tirmidhi-zuhd-37-will-you-explain, I can be rich and enter Jannah before the poor if I earn my living in a halal way and spend it in a halal way; use money for good, pay zakat, and if you can, offer Hajj. That's one of my goals, to pay Zakat and go to Hajj. I suggest you read the article for clarification. I remember that if you are an unbeliever and you are rich, your money will turn into a snake(in the akhira or next life), and say, "I am your wealth!", that's as far as I remember. May Allah(ta'ala or the glorified) forgive me for my errors. But I remember it that way. That would lessen the stress in me because I live with such paranormal activity happening constantly. Today should be the day I remind my parents about the person who will look at me concerning the ghosts, but I woke up good, and I feel good, and I don't want mom to worry, and I just let her send the person here by herself when she wants to. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God), I'm alright. What if I'm written on Forbes? I will, insha'Allah, never forget to pray to Allah, my Lord, at least the 5 obligatory prayers, every day, and just complete the 5 pillars of Islam. The paranormal is sometimes fun to be around.

Islam is peaceful

Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). I am thankful for air, was outside in the morning, good news, love, care. Allah(may he be glorified and exalted), gave me bliss when I entered Islam once again. In my worship, I sing praises of good words to Allah, and I feel in bliss and in peace. I can sleep at night thinking that there is a Lord that can protect me when I finish reciting Ayat Al-Kursi at night(the Satan is away from me after reciting this at night).

Allahu laaa ilaaha illaa huwal haiyul qai-yoom; laa taakhuzuhoo sinatunw wa laa nawm; lahoo maa fissamaawaati wa maa fil ard; man zallazee yashfa'u indahooo illaa be iznih; ya'lamu maa baina aideehim wa maa khalfahum; wa laa yuheetoona beshai 'immin 'ilmihee illa be maa shaaaa; wasi'a kursiyyuhus samaa waati wal arda wa la ya'ooduho hifzuhumaa; wa huwal aliyyul 'azeem

"Allah! There is no god but He - the Living, The Self-subsisting, Eternal. No slumber can seize Him Nor Sleep. His are all things In the heavens and on earth. Who is there can intercede In His presence except As he permitteth? He knoweth What (appeareth to His creatures As) Before or After or Behind them. Nor shall they compass Aught of his knowledge Except as He willeth. His throne doth extend Over the heavens And on earth, and He feeleth No fatigue in guarding And preserving them, For He is the Most High. The Supreme (in glory)."

Alhamdulillah. Allah indeed is the greatest. Allahuakbar. I watched the story of Yusuf Estes, a texan(if I'm correct) Christian who became a Muslim. Forgive me O Lord for my errors. He said he felt like crying, as far as I could remember, upon hearing his Muslim friend recite a Muslim prayer, as far as I could remember. I was singing an adhan-like thing, if I'm correct, while outside the unit. "Allahuakbar, Allahuakbar, Allahukabar. Ashadu Alailahaillallah Wa Ashadu Ana Muhammad Rasulallah". It's good to have certain laws guiding you in such a world like this. The world(dunya) is the prison of the Muslim. Sometimes, it's hard to grasp these new knowledge into my gut, but I'm getting used to it. I am fasting today. Alhamdulillah. Just a little while more and I'm finished writing here. I have chicken with soup mixed on rice to have later. It's here with me. Allahuakbar. I still remember some duas I've been pronouncing every morning, and before even every afternoon and evening as well.

I am happy to see my family plus some other good news

I am thankful for seeing my brother a while ago, I hear, I can now go down from this bunk as told by mom to brush my teeth(that means too that I can really go down from here and do what I want except for of course, doing evil, or I'll be in trouble), blogger, good old days. I was outside up to afternoon. I also prayed outside on my wheelchair. I asked my mom if I can, every morning, go out. It's a good thing to be hit by the sunlight. Alhamdulillah. Without Islam, there would be chaos. Because of Islam, good things happen. I so love my family. I become happy being with them and seeing them.

Praying gives you persistence and a reason to live

Your whole faith in Allah does, but with prayer, you are successful. I am thankful for prayer, guidance, food later(i'm fasting), delayed gratification(like fasting), new ways to conquer the paranormal problem. Alhamdulillah(All praise is due to Allah alone). Restraint is good and powerful. When you can control yourself, you can be successful. Why? If we become like animals who just do what they want to do any time, then we will be losers. I'm not saying the animals are losers by God's judgement. If you want to know the fate of animals, you can read here: https://islamqa.info/en/answers/11437/what-is-the-fate-of-animals-in-the-day-of-resurrection. I just knew this. Even the flies will be gathered. I'm not sure yet if they will go to heaven or hell after reading it, but there was something about God saying, "Be dust". You can voluntarily fast every Monday and Thursdays like the Prophet. Everyday, I have 1 hour settled for my studying Islam. Sometimes, I would go to YouTube and watch videos of like Mufti Menk. I also want to buy, insha'Allah, a robe like his or maybe have it any way I can, maybe through a gift, except stealing. Who knows? I may find it in a trash, and I'll just clean it. I was a scavenger back then of trash I sell on Junk Shops here in the Philippines. I want to be clean and pure while doing this, but sometimes maybe I will take risks to do a good deed, but I will clean myself later on. Man, God is good. I want him to be more good to me, so that's why I obey him as much as I can. I want to completely obey him so that paradise would be so sure of my life. I forgot the topic? Now why did I say praying gives persistence? Imagine compulsory needing to pray 5 times a day, and speaking good words along those prayers, and worshipping a God you believe without doubt, who will protect you from evil, doesn't that give you a lot of hope in life? 5 times a day. That means, if you think of killing yourself out of the hardships you face, you will resist that, because it is even commanded to us not to kill ourselves, or else you'll be punished in hell for eternity. You'll be doing that killing yourself in hell forever. Praying is positive. I have a motto saying, "God is the reason why". He is a reason. He is also the reason. He is the question, he is the answer.

Saying subhanahu wa ta'ala once only in a paragraph full of swt

I'm thankful for love, kindness, big smile, good heart, poverty. Yeah... I've learned a new thing today. What if I say, "may he be glorified and exalted or subhanahu wa ta'ala a lot of times because there are swts on a single paragraph"? I just tested it, saying it only once on that kind of paragraph. Knowing the English translation of the Arabic words I'm not that familiar with helps greatly. While I pray, I get to think of the translation and it is better. Alhamdulillah or Praise be to God. The reason I say "or Praise be to God" is because I may have international audience, of course, in this website. There is a translator here on this website on the right side panel. I list 5 things I'm thankful for each time I write a post here. It may be more or less. I've been writing 5. It changed to that format above. Before it was a list with number 1 to 5 descending. I am practicing delayed gratification or waiting for something patiently before you get rewarded like for example, fasting. You eat and drink before 5 am, and don't eat and drink after 5 am, and wait patiently and worship Allah with your prayers in either the obligatory prayers or with voluntary prayers, and eating at sunset. I eat after Maghrib or the 6:00 pm prayer. I wonder how the prophets and Muslims back then know the time. I'm guessing they looked at the sky, and of course sought help from Allah and trusted him. They maybe had the hourglass. Is it 24 hours done if all the dust is gone from the upper portion? Hm...

What should I do?

I am thankful for air, peace, tranquility, sustenance, and balance. Good to be back. Wasn't able to sleep after our midnight prayer Tajahhud, as far as I remember. Take it easy myself, these paranormal beings will eventually vanish. I learn something about them and how to handle life as time goes by. I don't need to mind them much. I need to keep busy. Don't need to let them win over me. They're noisy. I am learning to stay more calm. I'm thinking of doing ruqya, but that would make me unelegible for being from the 70,000 who will enter heaven without being brought to account. Hm... Maybe I'm not part of that like somebody who will enter heaven even if he/she isn't part of that. There are really beings telling what's inside my mind and Ruqya seems to be a thing that is used in exorcism that I can use. I'm listening to a Ruqya now. I just knew it has an Ayat Al-Kursi and Al-Fatihah.

People living on a machine, paralyzed, on life support machines have hope

I'm thankful for:

1. Paradise
2. Good deeds I can do for Allah(swt)
3. Normalcy
4. Poor yet happy
5. Charity

Yes. They do. Do you know that for an intention to do good, Allah rewards that and records it as one good deed? Indeed. It's pretty nice. I became paralyzed before. The reason must only be known by Allah and the unseen who knows it. Maybe these paranormal beings following me everywhere I go were beings that have been lurking near me before. Hm... It's wierd. Anyway, I want to live life like the Prophet Muhammad did. With all my wealth right now in terms of material things, I am oh so grateful to Allah(swt), and I want to give things to the poor and needy. Allah is kind. We should take note that he is the most kind of all. He is just. As long as I am good, and being that authentic, and I believe in him, I can go to heaven. Of course, I will follow the 5 pillars of Islam because I'm a Muslim. Islam is the religion of Allah(swt) that he chose for his people. Whoever you are, if you're good to God, he will be good to you. Maybe you have bad thoughts about God. He knows all your secrets. Of course, bad thoughts aren't recorded, only good thoughts that you intend to do. Let's get back to the topic. When we do a bad deed, it isn't recorded immediately. It is only recorded after 6 hours, as I read, and if before 6 hours you've already repented, it will not be recorded. I am amazed by Islam. Do you know that I pray sometimes in prostration to Allah(swt) using English? I am memorizing the English Translation of the prayer in Arabic. I have some papers here with the translation. Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God). I think you can repent to God just by feeling it or thinking of it. He is most High, and most appreciative. He wants you to know that he exists and he forgives all sins he said, just repent to him. While reciting the Istighfar or the part of the prayer where I repent with words to Allah(swt), while in English, it just seems simple words. All are good words. Imagine being filled with good words. You hear them being recited by you. What will your life be? And having comfort to the fact that there is a God, not a human, that can forgive you and take away the distress you are feeling and give you hope, and provide for you, love you, and give you Paradise, the true success. Alhamdulillah.

I slept good last night even with the supernatural beings

I am thankful for:

1. Allah's(swt) justice
2. I trust in Allah(swt)
3. Allah(swt) is trustworthy
4. Allah(swt) is a transcendent Patron
5. Allah(swt) is a transcendent helper

In the name of God(swt), the most beneficent, the most merciful. Even if I didn't sleep fast once I lay down to sleep. You know. You wake up somewhere at 5 in the morning, take a Qailulah or siesta for about 20-30 minutes at the afternoon(by the way, I've decided to make it 30 minutes always), and sleep at night after Isha. I didn't sleep right away. Is this normal? There are posts of some page on Facebook saying, "A day dreamer and a night thinker". I wonder why my fat brother goes to sleep fast or maybe he's playing it so he can have the sense of going to sleep(he snores) and he just looks like he's already asleep after a few minutes or even seconds of laying down or sometimes on his chair. He faces a computer every day. As much as I know. He's there below, and I'm here up. A double deck? He has no soft bed. He sleeps on the floor. I woke up somewhere near midnight and I prayed Tahajjud. I'm thinking of doing an additional Witr as I've searched a moment ago. Only 1 rakaat can do for Witr and 2 rakaats can suffice for Tahajjud. I did Salat Al-Ishraq and Allah(swt) said, as far as I can remember, that he will help you with your tasks of the day if you pray it and I'm still here awake and I didn't sleep again in the morning after Fajr like before. Ishraq can have 2 rakaats as I remember.

Excited to walk again normally

I am thankful for:

1. Still have a chance to work normally again

2. Mercy of Allah(subhanahu wa ta'ala[swt] or glory to him, the exalted)

3. Poverty's good

4. Consistency

5. Patience

In the name of Allah(swt), yeah, I'm excited. It's like I'm in a prison. The world or dunya is the prisoner of a Muslim, and the paradise of a kafir. Still, you will need to achieve the paradise of this world to achieve the paradise in the hereafter. And that paradise is the bliss and joy you get from worshipping Allah(swt). I have achieved it. I will get better by Allah's will. Alhamdulillah. Lets be careful of making known to others our sins. You will not be excused on a certain day, as the prophet said, maybe on the day of resurrection, if you are one who is aware in sharing his/her sins to others. Are you doing it for boasting? If we keep silent about our sins, and just let God and the unseen know it, then we would decrease sin in the world. If we share it, others might replicate or copy it. I am fasting today. Maybe I would be on prosthetic legs because my feet is still broken and I can't control it anymore. I can't rotate it or move it good. It's just stagnant. Anyway, I am hopeful that things will get better. That I will walk normally again and my incontinence will be fixed. Don't say insha'Allah if you want your dua to be firm or resolute, as I learned from the Prophet Muhammad.

Why do I feel sleepy?

I am thankful for:

1. Still alive and has a good chance to go to Jannah(Paradise).
2. Birthday yesterday(I ate litson manok or roasted chicken).
3. A silent older brother greeted me happy birthday on Facebook for the first time I think.
4. Opportunity
5. Good

I felt sleepy. These has been happening. I'm not sure if it's just that I wake up early. Of course, I will feel somehow sleepy but I then sleep. Really sleepy. The super-natural beings help in making me sleepy. I think too much and my head suddenly gets tired. I'm worried that this might happen at school. What I plan to do, insha'Allah, is I will bear patiently, and sleep if I can, and have faith in the Almighty Allah(subhanahu wa ta'ala[swt] or may he be glorified and exalted). We should never tell "We will do this tomorrow" without saying, "Insha'Allah" or "if Allah wills". I read that on Surah Al-Khaf or the Surah you recite every Friday. When I pray, I get to wake up. I prayed the Duhr prayer, but then I have a Qailulah or the siesta of a Muslim, and I still slept up until near 3:00, and I prayed for Azr. I thought I just want to relax. I'm not at school yet. I sometimes contort my face like I am in hardship because of the super-natural beings. They will say something, and I get to contort my face. I got a problem with this. My sister thought I was being disgusted. O Allah(swt), forgive me. When will this end? I've been praying. I pray everyday. I really wish they would just instantly get out of my life. I would never wish this to anyone. Still, they can be a blessing sometimes. Some people are suffering in silence, and maybe there are things they might have said that could have helped. I'm going to read for 15 minutes after this. It's a routine. I want to be successful. I will be successful with the help of Allah(swt). My success is only by Allah(swt). And as I've said, they got me closer to Allah(swt), as part of the blessing. I plan to fast tomorrow and after tomorrow because I should've fasted on Monday, but it was my birthday. Today, I was fasting until I forgot I was and so when mom handed me my medicines, I forgot to tell her I'm fasting, so I drank water to take the medicine in. I am thankful because we would see a Muslim person, as mom said, to handle my problems with the super-natural beings. I want to tell my mom that there are exorcists who are really those who take away evil spirits from people. There is this term in the spiritual realm known as Ruqyah which is derived either from Arabic رقى (ruqia) meaning "rise, ascent" or from رقية (ruqyah) meaning "spell, charm, incantation". It also means "enchanting, bewitching or of being armed against sorcery". Ruqayyah is the name of a daughter of the Islamic prophet Mohammad and wife of third Rashidun caliph Uthman.

Alhamdulillah or Praise be to God

I am thankful for:

1. Allah's(swt) mercy.
2. Hope from Allah(swt).
3. Kindness
4. Good
5. Paradise

Alhamdulillah(Praise be to God or All praise is due to God alone). I think I would be changing the translation I do here with Alhamdulillah to "All praise is due to God alone" because that would entail we should praise God alone. I think Allah(swt) would forgive if you praise people, but never in a way that you praise God, be the same with theirs. I have a Tuna Omelette here bought from 7-11. I didn't buy it. I really love the poor. I want to be closer to them than the rich. I want to be surrounded by Muslims. Alhamdulillah. Nothing is impossible with Allah(swt). If you only know my situation. I am here with super-natural beings that tell what's inside my mind. It's insane. But with Allah(swt), and my worship towards him, he has given me bliss.

And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss.

Look at these faces everywhere. We should now bow to the Lord. Why are we still persisting in sin? Do we think that this has been made so that we should sin more? Even these super-natural beings telling what's inside my mind is also a blessing because I have been closer to God because of them, and add these faces everywhere. Who else can do this? Not a man. Not a creation of God. But only God. Only Allah(swt). I am oh so thankful to the Lord Allah(swt). I will be held in honor because I have read, as far as I can remember, that when you are in a state of injustice, and you persist worshipping God, you will be held in honor. Alhamdulillah. May Allah(swt) have mercy on his believers and guide the unbelievers. I shall be afraid only of Allah(swt), as Allah(swt) wants. You can only follow your parents, and be obedient to them, as long as their commandment does not sway you from Allah(swt)'s commands. Allahuakbar(Allah is the greatest). I want to be in Paradise. I want to live poor and die poor and be among the poor in the Day of Resurrection. That way, I would be first of those who enter Jannah or Paradise. Alhamudlillah(All praise is due to God alone). Allah(swt) has made my websites clear and pure. Away from sin. Allah(swt) is full of praise, full of glory. May God bestow mercy on me and his believers. 

Be careful

Muslim reports from 'Abdullaah ibn 'Amr (ra) that the Messenger of Allah (saw) said "The poor of the Muhajireen will enter Paradise forty years ahead of the rich". (Mishkaat al-Masaabeeh, 2/663, no. 5235)

"The poor will enter Paradise five hundred years before the rich." (Tirmidhi, Zuhd 37)

Since I knew this, I've been stopping myself to affirm the definite purpose I read about on Think and Grow Rich. In our unit, condo, as I am limp as of the moment, I bathed with the lights off to save electricity. I also was thrifty with the way I used water. I know I should clean and purify myself good. I did so with the best of my ability while saving water.

I plan to give as charity whatever it is my wealth before I die:

I am thankful for:

1. Night is approaching.
2. Tomorrow, I will be checked by a Muslim for my problem with some super-natural beings, as mom said.
3. Paradise.
4. Lessons learned.
5. Good.

Had a hard time last night

I don't know why, but my heart just suddenly palpitated hard. Was I just so tired? Maybe the paranormal I'm talking about is connected. I fasted yesterday. I told my mom this morning and she thought it was my fasting that made it. I was scared but I stayed calm as much as I can. I invoked Allah's name in my head and maybe even whispered, asking for help. I was also complaining in my head asking why. There's someone in the Quran named Ya'qub who said, "I only complain of my grief and sorrow to Allah... [Quran: Surah Yusuf: Verse 86]. Why would God do this to me? I'm not perfect. Allah has punished me. It's a blessing in disguise too. I don't want to think that I am punished by Allah. Sometimes, I get stupefied thinking this could go all of my life. But I searched for something that makes your wishes come true and I followed the instructions. I said the hasanat or the one giving peace and blessings to Muhammad, as it was given to Ibrahim, 11 times, and 1000 times of "Alahus Samad" and 11 times again of the hasanat. Then I sent blessings upon the prophet in a way I can, as instructed. Some sort of Savab/Sawab. It was Savab on the video but I searched Google for it's meaning and I remember Sawab came, so maybe it was a typo. Then I made a dua for my Hajat, and I searched how, but I didn't see a specific point on how so I just prayed 2 rakaats of prayer because there was a salatul-Hajat said in a page I saw. Maybe I can pray for it that way. I remember even praying a normal dua with my hands asking for something. If you could pray for me, if you pity me, I would be grateful to you, and for my sister who passed away. Alhamdulillah. I prayed Fajr but I slept again until Duhr and prayed. Now I'm alive. When we sleep, it's a minor death. Oh yeah. I remember saying to my mom that each time she thinks of wanting to die, as far as I remember, she just remembers that every time we sleep, it is a minor death. Maybe I just need to sleep it each night because all day paranormal beings tell what's inside my mind. Sometimes, I am in bliss because of my faith in Allah. I worship him everyday and night.